The Queen’s Hoard
Genevieve de la Rose crept along a tunnel under the castle. A spell muted her passing, and she’d chosen a moonless night to steal back her bauble, which Queen Lenora had stolen first. Genevieve would never have bothered the queen if not for that. She would have remained at the Mage Circle Academy under the forest’s eaves, working in her alchemical laboratory or teaching spells. But, no, Queen Lenora must have everything and could not even bother to ask politely. Well, Genevieve was not going to stand for it, even when the headmistress said to let it be. Genevieve de la Rose would have back her bauble!
The lock on the queen’s treasure room surrendered to an unbinding spell, and the glow of gold and gems made Genevieve stop and blink. Greedy crow! Genevieve’s bauble gleamed on a silver-wrought pedestal. She snatched it from the hoard, tucked it in a bag, and tiptoed out.
“Halt!”
Queen’s soldiers! Genevieve ran. The soldier’s boots clomped on the stone floor. Torches lit the corridor at her back. Twice she tossed confusion spells over her shoulder. The soldiers puzzled shouts echoed in the passages. Genevieve rushed up a stairway and burst through a doorway into the night.
On the parapet, surrounded by soldiers with torches, Queen Lenora waited.
“No!”
“Give it back,” said the queen.
Genevieve reached into the bag. Lenora extended her hand, but Genevieve raised her bauble high. Light poured out, blinding the soldiers and queen.
In an eerie voice, Genevieve cast a spell and rose in the air. Floating on magical wind, she drifted off the parapet. On the ground outside the castle, she ran while arrows whistled past, but the night was dark and the archers missed.
Genevieve would never teach in the realm again but had her bauble.
Meta-story: My word limit was 300, and I had to use the words twice, circle, and blink. This piece won first in the daily flash fiction contest judged by Arakun at writing.com. I personally think it needs another 50 to 100 words to be any good. I call it another children’s fantasy flash fiction.
June 2, 2017 at 6:46 am
That’s some bauble. I like the dynamism in the protagonist hurling confusion spells over her shoulder while running the other way. The alchemical laboratory is a good hook, worth developing.
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June 2, 2017 at 7:11 am
Thanks! I might have tried to squeeze too much into 300 words. Genevieve probably needs her own short story. Thank you for commenting.
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June 2, 2017 at 8:57 am
That’s great that you’ve found a new genre to write in for these challenges, Kecia. The opening certainly hinted at the possibility of a larger story, but it funneled as the story moved on, and as a reader I felt perfectly satisfied with how it ended.
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June 2, 2017 at 9:40 am
300 words invites more description or characterization, which can easily become irrelevant. The 100 word format requires nothing but the plot, so there’s less chance of giving a detail that hangs unresolved at the end. That may just be my experience. Switching between the different mindset/styles required for the two lengths is not as easy as it seems.
My hope was that the Mage Circle information was world- and character-building rather than distracting. I also tried to establish Genevieve’s goal, so I think it was worthwhile. I’m glad it worked for you.
Thanks for the feedback. It made me look at that opening again.
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June 4, 2017 at 9:44 am
Exciting. Thanks for the adventure.
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June 4, 2017 at 9:44 am
❤
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